Monday, August 17, 2009
Walking
I'm wrting this entry as i'm walking home, juz like friday nite. I missed my last train back cuz i had final supper with nick, he's finishing his attachment already. Following on i took a bus back with mr. Zul, my ex WOP manager. On the bus, i didn't really noticed the couple behind us as they dun look a least bit familiar to me at 1st. But when mr. Zul fell asleep and i looked into the mirror's reflection den i noticed the guy. It's derrick, my old fren from sec sch. I dunno if he noticed about me or not but looking at him brought me back to the happy moments we once had. At the same time baby was smsing with me as she had trouble sleeping, i told her about me spraining my ankle and falling down. She immediately asked if i'm alright and stuffs, i can see that she's worried about me. She's actually been very worried and cared about me more than anyone else, juz tat she dun say it out loud. I really felt a mixture of feelings right now, dunno how to explain it. If i can, i would hug baby tightly and tell her that i love her. Even though we'll be seeing each other in less than 24 hours, but i can't help to miss her..
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
1:12 AM
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Fire
Is it a prize for staying up late at night?
I just witnessed a carpark fire at my block's carpatk! It happened at around 3am when i was about to sleep, i smell smoke coming from the carpark, i went to the window and i looked down. I saw thick black smoke coming from 2nd level of the carpark! Soon after that, police and firemen came. They went up to the scene and started to put out the fire, i could hear 4 bangs coming from the car. I think it must be the tires caught fire den exploded.
I was watcing all the way until the fire was put out, by then alot of the resident had already woken up and went down to check on their vehicle. Time for bed man! I'll go down and look at the mess myself tomorrow, it's been an exciting night for me! What about u? Is your night exciting as well? :)
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
3:51 AM
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Count Down
Very soon it'll be my last day working in Holiday Inn Park View, it's like less than a month away.
I dunno if I should be happy or sad, I spent 1 year of my life there and I met people from all walks of life there, I went to my 1st funeral (not counting my grandparent's), I had many many more 1st times there and I really really enjoyed working with everyone there.
Working makes me realised that I'm not the greatest, there's always someone who is greater than me, someone who is smarter than me and these makes me wanna learnt more from them.
I also found my target and my goal there, to reach Jagdeep Thakral's position. (If you guys do not know who he is, he's my ex F&B director, he's a great man who has a lot of strict rles and high expections. He's now in Holiday Inn Penang as a Residence Manager) That's where's I wanna go and that's who I wanna be.
I talked to baby this afternoon about savings and stuffs, she actually calculated how long will we take to get married. she based on a 1k income and a 60k+ wedding budget and this is what she got- getting married when she's 26 (which is like 10years time)
THAT WAS A NO WAY MAN! I'm not getting married at 30+! I wanna get married b around 25! Therefore I arrived at a conclusion, I'll work very hard and save a lot so that we can get married at 25. smart eh? =D
People might think that i'm crazy or what but i dun care, who can find someone that loves him so easily?
although baby is violent, pampered, likes to throw tantrum, blur blur, silly, UNROMANTIC and loves to scold me, but I love her for who she is. I never regret falling in love with her since day 1. Nobody is perfect, there's always flaw in everyone else. She can be unromantic, she can dun say the 3 word often and she can act as if I'm not important at all. But 1 thing i know is she uses her kind of way to tell me that he cared and loves me a lot, I meant everything to her.
Perhaps she's not that expressive as I am but I still can feel it.
muacks baby. I.L.Y
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
1:28 AM
Monday, August 10, 2009
Random at 4.20am
I'm supposed to be sleeping, but i'm not a least bit tired! Anyways, i stumbled upon this on yvonne's fren's blog:
Don't ever EVER use maybe as an excuse. -That's how i see it from my point of view cause too many people uses MAYBE as an excuse to run away from things. It's like bullshit once u used too many times.
Maybe it's cause it's only gonna be Friday in four more days.
Maybe it's cause this weekend is gonna be crazy.
Maybe it's cause you weren't responsive at all.
Maybe it's cause I think about you just by a simple remark that sounds like what you've said to me once.
Maybe it's cause walking down a certain path makes me remember.
Maybe it's cause I'm disappointed in how you're treating me.
Maybe it's cause I've grown tired of doing all the work.
Maybe it's cause I still have much more work to finish.
Maybe it's cause I don't like people thinking that I assume I'm all that when I don't.
Maybe it's cause I don't trust you.
Maybe it's cause I miss you coming home.
Maybe it's cause I can't even bring myself to ask you why you're gone.
Maybe it's cause you speak to me at all the wrong times.
Maybe it's cause you gave me an unhappy vibe.
Maybe it's cause you didn't bother saying hello.
Maybe it's cause you never cared to ask how I was doing.
Maybe it's cause I feel as though I'm doing all the giving and you're just taking and taking and taking.
Maybe it's cause you guys pushed it too far today.
Maybe it's cause I'm not honest at times.
Maybe it's cause I don't know what to feel right now.
Maybe it's cause I'm psyching myself out.
Maybe it's cause today started out pretty bad.
Maybe it's cause I'm tired.
Maybe it's cause I feel really lost, confused and alone right now.
Maybe it's cause I don't like being in dilemmas.
Maybe it's cause I'm making a big fuss out of nothing at all.
Maybe it's cause we haven't gotten the time to practise for our performance yet.
Maybe it's cause I'm worried for you, and I want to do something for you, but I just can't figure out what just yet.
Maybe it's cause this is all bullshit.
"Don't look back
cause I just might give in
and start falling for you again."
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
4:23 AM
Sunday, August 9, 2009
random
R.A.N.D.O.M
Something which I saw on wen's blog and seems to be taken in by it.
There's a lil truth behind every "just kidding".
There's a lil curiosity behind every "just wondering".
There's a lil knowledge behind every "i don't know".
There's a lil something behind every "nothing".
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
9:05 PM
National Day
sians.. It's national day and i'm trapped in a confined space with no windows or any transparent object that can let me look out the sky. I'm not being held captive don't worry, I'm just being held up at work..but i can't deny the fact that.. IT'S NATIONAL DAY! I'M BY RIGHT SUPPOSE TO CELEBRATE WITH BABY AT MARINA WATCHING FIREWORKS JUST LIKE LAST YEAR! BUT WHAT THE F#$K AM I DOING AT HOLIDAY INN PARK VIEW?! :(
I miss going to NDP with baby, awwww.. =(
I was talking to yvonne via company phone, over the background I could hear the plane fly pass! shit man! i can't even hear a shit in this confined box! =(
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
8:16 PM
Monday, August 3, 2009
Yesterday & today
I was working ytd when i decided to call baby, when talking to her, i realised that she was crying and something was wrong. She was drinking obviously, i gt so panicked tat i called nite immediately to locate her. Nite found baby at pasir ris park and by tat time i was about to leave the hotel already. I told "mum" tat i had something urgent to attend to, she asked me wad happened and i explained to her. She immediately told me to finish my work den go off quickly.
While doing my work, thoughts ran through my mind. Y was baby so drunk and crying? What happened? Y she didn't tell me anything at all? I was typing and trembling, i even lost my temper an shouted at some of those chamber maida over the fone. Once again "mum" asked me to get a hold of myself and think on the bright side..
But baby was fucking drunk and i dunno wad will happened to her. How to look on the bright side?? Baby told me dun come and she was fucking drunk, i couldn't really make out what was happening. All i noe tat is i'm worried sick, i boke down while talking to baby over the fone. When i came out, "mum" asked me wad happened and i told her. She comforted me and asked me to take it easy, i finally calmed myself down.
After that i called baby and she had difficulties breathing and she feel like throwing up. I immediate told her to take a rest. Those questions kept appearing in my mind for a long time until i got home, at around 2 am, baby sms me feeling much more sober now. She saod that she was very hot, i knew that her hangover kicked in already.
I woke up very early this morning and rushed over to see baby, thinkin that she will be hungry after throwing up so many times, i bought her some da ba bao. I sat down there thinking about the questions and i was thinking that the things that she said when drunk was not true.
i finally saw baby but she juz seems like nothing happened at all. The moment i saw her, i finally had a sense of relieve. We had some chat and i left at 1.45 for community service.
Hais.. Guess i wasn't as strong as before, u noe when u already had the girl tat u wanna live with for life and suddenly she gave u a big shock. The feeling, i really can't take it. Baby is very deary to me, i simply can't live without her. Even though she always scold, pinch and bite me. But i never once hated her, in fact i love her more and more. She really became part of my life, something that i can't live without. Just like air..
Even ling and other of my exs dun come anywhere closer as compared to baby..
Baby nxt time please dun scare me anymore. I really can't imagine 1 day without u.. :(
I love you baby. Muacks.
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
3:03 AM
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Happy day!!
i woke up this morning feeling abit funny, i sat down at the com trying to fix it for damn long but it can't work..
den i suddenly have this urge to meet baby, my intuition tells me if i dun do it now den i'll regret forever. I immediately ran to shower and dress up, after that i ran out of the house. i wanted to get roses for baby but i remembered hw much she hate flowers, i decided to get her chocolate instead. I reached pasir ris at 12noon and i immediately went to get chocolates. After that i cab down to baby's sch as i dun wanna waste time. I reached there juz 10 mins before her sch ends.
I stand there anxiously thinking abt wad baby will say. I finally saw baby walking towards me at 12.35. I can't help but to smile stipidly at her. Man i really miss baby! I immediate gave baby the chocolates and sent baby home before goin to work. Of course in between there's alot of things happened, but i wun tell u! It's our secret! My intuition was right! Baby isn't angry at me anymore!! Weee!!
I love u baby!! Muackss muacksss muacks!!
my LOVE for YOU never FADES. This is for YOU My LOVE x33
2:06 AM